There was a time I felt that closed doors left me accursed.
I must be doing something wrong. Nothing is going right for me. These were the words that poured out of my heart almost daily. Weeks passed, then months, then years, still nothing. Being obedient and doing what was right had also not brought me the outcome I expected. I sought Godly counsel, pleaded the blood of Jesus, fasted and prayed, verbally denounced generational curses, and did all I could do and still nothing. I experienced hardship after hardship and felt the pains of injustice. However, my complaints seem to drift further apart and eventually they nearly completed faded. Sure, I would have moments of tears or express disappointment, but something inside of me had transformed. I had developed a trust that changed me.
As I moved up and down the hallway filled with closed doors, there was always ONE door that remained. You guessed it, my sweet and faithful Jesus! However, I didn’t want Jesus you see? I wanted answers. Answers I felt were through all those closed doors. My thought to myself was, I have Jesus?! so he can’t possibly be what I need, I want more. Yet God could see what my heart could not. Without words he knew, “my daughter does not believe that Jesus is enough for her” and so he had to show me. SHUT THOSE DOORS he commanded. And no matter how much help I sought nor who tried to help me, those doors were not going to open, not until I knew that Jesus is ENOUGH! Revelations 3:7 “What he opens noone can shut, and what he shuts noonecan open.”
Now I look back and understand all those years of closed doors. Behind all those “no’s” or “not yet” had been a strategic plan of our Father to transform me. I can honestly say my heart is now joyful inside. My mourning has reconstructed into songs of praise unto the Lord. The best part of this new experience is that my joy does not depend on my ever changing circumstances. Think about it, if just one of those doors had come open at the wrong time, I would have placed my trust in the answer behind that door. If just one had opened up to me prematurely, sure I might have thanked the Lord for it, but I would have never truly understood that Jesus is EVERYTHING. That’s God’s perfect Order. John 20:26 “… Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!”
My faith walk with God had to get to a place where my heart knows that Jesus is ALL I need, PERIOD. If you find yourself in a hallway of closed doors, REJOICE! JESUS IS ALL YOU NEED. Jeremiah 31:13 “…I will turn their mourning into joy; I will comfort them, and give them gladness for sorrow.”